So, a while back I was getting pranked by the neighborhood cat. He's the leader of a gang on our street. He's a big fat mess of fur. I feel like cats have this keen awareness, like how bees can smell fear, that they just know when someone is allergic and doesn't necessarily feel kindly toward them. Kind of like the attitude we have with bees. Once cats have this awareness, the game is on. They will either purposely rub up all on you while you are in an interview, pretending that you like cats, or jump out at you at your friends' houses like it's an extreme sport to scare the shit out of Lisa. I have so many damn cat stories.
So, anyway, when I first moved into my house, there was a continuous steaming pile of poop right in the middle of my front porch, waiting to get me. It went on for a while. I wondered if he was hiding somewhere across the street with his chums watching me and chuckling like a grade-schooler. So immature. Then I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe it was my hazing into the neighborhood. Maybe it was like being greeted with cookies or brownies when you're new, like they did in the 50's. Do people still do this? Maybe I was just greeted with a different type of "chocolate." I can't really picture all of this, I think he definitely has more of an evil or indifferent attitude, but picturing him in this way made me feel better for some reason. I've never heard of a "good" gang leader, have you?
So, now, when I open the door to get my mail, I always look down first. "NOT TODAY SUCKA! NOT TODAY."
I left the pile there as a signal to all the other hoodlums that they didn't get me. It doesn't even bother me. Ha. Jokes on you.
However, now that I think of it, this may have started an involuntary war with my mail lady. It explains a lot. More on that later.
Make it a great Monday,
Do you have a funny cat story? Tell me in the comments!
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