"I DO TOO LIKE YELLOW!" What I Learned From a 5yr old

One weekend I was back home, hanging out with my sister, bro-in-law, and the kiddos, reveling in some cozy at-home time. The kids must've been razzing my nephew, Joshie, 5yrs old, because all of a sudden he yelled, "I DO TOO LIKE YELLOW!!!"  "What's happening?" asked the adults. "She's saying that I don't like yellow and I do!" fumed Joshie. He was TICKED. The anger amplified by the minute. We adults snickered at the ridiculousness of this. They said something parental, which I don't remember, and Joshie moved on.

I thought to myself, wow, how often do I do that too? I'm probably doing it right now. Holding onto things that don't matter at all, really? My situations don't ever FEEL ridiculous, of course, because adults deal with heavier issues, but it still is the same thing when you get down to it. 

"I DO TOO LIKE YELLOW!"  Very much like the key phrases:

  • "Do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?"
  • "How important is it?"
  • "How cheaply am I willing to sell my serenity?"

These quotes help when I find myself over-analyzing or obsessing over a situation out of my control and not giving my energy to the present moment, or what really matters. My thoughts can drift to past conversations, situations as unfair as all get out (narcissists are everywhere here in adulthood! You deal with one and ten more come out of the woodwork!), the woulda coulda shouldas...  Resentments, memories that barge in uninvited, caring about what other people think-in any way, other people's words or behavior, a misunderstanding, a complete misconception of me- or my work, or a flat out untruth, etc. How often am I bellowing out “I DO TOO LIKE YELLOW!”, deep down, subconsciously, instead of letting go?

At that time, I noticed the correlation with Joshie's anger and some floating feelings of mine, stemming from my boss, company politics, which then expands into a downward black spiral of national politics, and maybe some intrusive unnerving memories of an ex-headcase that comes with random instigators once in a while, trying to get an uprise of mental anguish from me. In such a case, I feel like God is the adult and I am the child, and He’s telling me, “It doesn’t matter. The point is that you are out of that situation. Focus on what’s important- what’s in front of you.”

This correlation is also pertinent to interactions with family members and friends. And again,  politics- any situation out of our control. When you feel like people just don't "get it", or, in Joshie’s case, don’t “get you"-- even if it's your circle, your tribe, the ones who should above all others "get you"--- and you have to defend yourself... You really don't. Ever.

I have a wise old friend that always reminds me, "You know the truth. God knows the truth. That's all that is necessary."  I never thought that I needed those words as much as I do. I've always considered myself one that doesn't care what people think. But that emerges for all of us in a deeper sense everyday. There will always be cases where we have to practice this logic. Detach. There are people we come into contact with daily that will just never "get it".  Their behavior and words could really get me seething... Or I can detach from it completely and cut that string. It doesn’t have to affect me. 

We expect our families to truly know us. But, do you know of anyone who actually feels this way? Me neither. We are human. It can feel comfortless and isolating, but that's all a part of it. It's why we need God so much (or whatever you deem your Higher Power to be), and why it's imperative to strengthen that spiritual relationship continuously.
Because I am a sucker for quotes, I will also lay down these well-known gems:

  • "Never waste time on people who are committed to misunderstanding you."
  • "Be a good person, but don't waste time proving it."

Now, when I find myself upset or holding onto something that I need to let go of, when I have this awareness, I hear Joshie screaming "I DO TOO LIKE YELLOW!!!"  And I am aware that I am being silly, and I move on.

Silly Monday to you,

Did you like this post? Tell me a trick or quote that helps you to detach and let go in the comments below. Please share this post and subscribe below to receive this silly blog in your inbox twice a month.

My Ass is Broke

We're going sledding up north at the cottage this weekend. I remember...

I was a younger tween-ish something. We were up north with my cousins and aunt and uncle. My dad and my uncle take the four kids sledding. 

They look at all the kids and think, "Why isn't anyone on that hill right there?"
We'll come back to this. This will always be a sign for decision-making.

So, we go doubles on a sled and my nothing-but-a-peanut of a cousin, Ellen, is in front of me. She's six years younger than me. Basically a toddler at the time. 

That is why when we flew into the air because of a bump not seen in the white snow, WE didn't come down the same way with the same force. My tailbone took it all.  All of the force. Going through the air, in slow motion (picture faces in slow motion screaming), the helplessness hit that I have no control over what's about to happen. This is going to hurt. 

To this day, I have to watch how I sit. Sometimes I have to readjust and lift a cheek (like how untrustworthy boys do when they fart. You know, they just kind of... lift a cheek?). I wonder if co-workers think that's what I'm doing. I am not farting! It's my tailbone.

Sometimes I'll come home and have to lay on my belly. How your feet hurt after a long day? My butt hurts. Like how bad knees tell you when it's raining? My butt hurts. I don't really know that for sure because I have bad knees too. So, I just know it's going to rain.

I have clear visions of my dad, my uncle, my cousin, and my sister (because she laughed) at this snippet of time in my memory. I guess you could say that they are all literally a pain in my ass. 

Lessons learned:
Make your dads go first.

Also, whenever you ask yourself "Why aren't people over here?" or "Why wouldn't everyone do such and such?".... Stop and reassess the situation. Maybe ask someone. 
I asked myself something similar in Maui. "Why aren't people swimming at sunset?" (It's feeding time for sharks. I found that out and never did that again. If Hawaiians aren't in the water, you don't go in the water.)

There's always a reason... If it's an obvious thought, don't you think all the dummies out there would have thought of that too? Sometimes following the crowd is a good thing.

Just thinking about the unfortunate event is making me mad at my sister for laughing. Inappropriate timing. Jerk. 

Take a minute to be silly today,

Treadmill Troubles

Happy New Year! As we are getting back to reality after the holidays, back to adulting and responsibilities, most of us are getting back to the gym as well. Resolutions are so big in January, right?! I caught my reflection in the mirror at Zumba and was thinking, "That can't be right. How did that happen on Christmas break?" Oh my. Damn Christmas cookies. Lasagna. All things Italian and gooey with cheese. 

I started thinking back to each year's resolution- the typical standard resolution that I'm sure we all have. While pondering, a flashback popped into my head. I can hear my sister laughing, as this is one of her favorites.

I was at the gym at my old apartment building, on the treadmill. Everything is going smoothly and steady, and then, all of a sudden, I must have hit the wrong button, I don't really remember. The speed changed when I wasn't mentally aware that it was about to, and instead of spreading my feet off to the sides, which are stable, my first instinct was to try to catch my feet up to the track. It was a knobbly-kneed mess. I was going down. I tried to catch up, and was making a go of it for a while like a brand new deer and then the track abruptly flung me to the back of the machine, where I promptly fell. It was loud and obnoxious. Picture someone's face while falling. Yeah. I think that's why my sis likes this story so much. She loves when people fall. You have to admit, their faces are hysterical. This was not just an instant jolt, either. It took a while to actually execute. So my face had to go through a series of contortions. 

So, I sat on the ground for a minute and started laughing. The guy next to me was trying to keep his laughter a secret and had to eventually stop his machine and leave. He left the gym. This is what got me- the Barbie chick in front of me- she turned around and gave me stink-eye! Stink-eye! Really? So sorry for YOUR inconvenience. Nice empathy skills at old Ramblewood Apartments. 

The gym for grownups is still the same as gym class, when you think about it. We're all vulnerable and probably going to do something wrong or stupid at some point in front of all the kids. More flashbacks coming at me from grade school... Eeshk. And we all had that chick that was perfect at everything and did 50 timed pull-ups when you couldn't even do one. (I just hung there, dangling, in front of Mr. Miller and all the kids.)

You gotta laugh.

And, also, use the elliptical. It's safer.

Happy New Year,